mom dad im in love with a robot
the bible says adam and eve not florence and the machine
sometimes i pull my headphones out of my purse and they pull out things like chap stick, tampons, whales and like the whole country of russia like are you kidding me
I can not count the number of times this trick has saved my ass.
And people say Tumblr doesn’t teach you life skills…
this will come in handy one day
ATTENTION GRADUATING CLASS OF 2013: COLLEGE SURVIVAL 101
Reblogging for future reference..
|Douche:||you know, there should be a warning sign on my dick|
|Nice girl:||excuse me?|
|Douche:||yeah, it should say choking hazard lol *hi fives bros*|
|Nice girl:||isn't that a label they put on small objects?|